Panthers v Vale (home).

The idea seemed appealing at the time. Take over from regular “Man in Black” Tim willis, have a run around with the kids, bit of banter with the touchline, bacon butty, cup of tea, job done!
There were no beach balls (although plenty of mention of them). No questions about fitness (other than in my own head). However, there was an irate mother and some “Fergie-time” controversy to liven up an otherwise drab Knutsford morning.
It has been about a year since I last put myself forward for the job and it will probably be another year before I do it again (is that cheering I hear?). Jim reminded me that the last time I reffed was against Vale when we lost heavily. I may not have improved much in 12 months but I must say that the kids have improved greatly. The boys (and girls) have added steel to their tremendous skill and flair. Their behaviour is exemplary and the “never say die” attitude that we have seen a few times this season is a credit to them and their management. Well done and keep up the good work!
Enough about them though. Let’s talk about the real star of the show...
The penalty for Egerton was “stonewall”. Whatever that means. Well converted under pressure by Leo.
A few minutes later Vale had a shout for a pen themselves. 20 years ago it would have been a pen. Nowadays “ball to hand” means that most handballs in the box go unpunished. Luke defended John Terry style. He threw himself in to block the ball at point blank range and certainly did not intend to handball.
The Vale supporters (but not the coaches) had a bit of a moan and Mrs Vale called me a cheat. When I challenged her about it she went the same colour as the beach ball. She couldn’t really argue when I pointed out that their coach, who was stood on the far end of the pitch where I had given the penalty, hadn’t complained.
The match went on a fair bit longer than Vale were happy with. I took the decision to stop the watch for all substitutions (of which there were dozens) and every time a lace needed tying (4 times). I also stopped the watch when the ball was cleared for a throw or corner where the ball went into the trees or onto another pitch. I think that was the fairest way of doing it otherwise the boys would get about 10 minutes playing time per half.
Anyway, I didn’t get my bacon butty but I did get my banter! Tim, you can have the whistle back next week!

This weeks man in black was sponsored by Breitling Watches. Instruments for professionals!